This year we had a couple of health scares in our family.  It caused a lot of fear and anxiety.  Thankfully, God answered our prayers.  He delivered us yet again.

But this question lingers in my mind: what if He didn’t?  What if this time, He chooses to be silent?

What will my life be like?  Will my faith still stand firm?  Will I still thank Him every morning?

When we are stressed about selling the house, I tell my husband: just trust in God.

When my friend battles with anxiety, I tell her: just trust in God.

What I am really saying is: everything will be ok. God will take care of this.

But…

What if He doesn’t?

What if He chooses to hide His face from me when I need Him the most?

I always have questions for God when bad things happen:

“Why did you allow this to happen? When will you answer my prayer?“

But sometimes God has questions for me too:

“Do you really trust me?“

“Will you thank me even if things don’t go your way?“

Man, this is a heavy topic.

Because gosh, I don’t like problems, I don’t like trials; I don’t even like inconveniences in my life. 

But…

God chooses to love me even though I don’t deserve it.

So I need to choose to love God even in the times He is silent.

And I have to choose to trust when trusting is hard. 

When I say I want to have a relationship with God, I need to remember that a relationship always takes two to make it work.

“Trust in Him at all times, you people; Pour our your hearts to Him, For God is our refuge.” Psalm 62:8